You know the feeling. Your dancing along and it’s just not happening. What is a girl to do? Dance is an elusive thing and the high you get while dancing can be even more elusive. I have found over the years that sometimes I am just stressed or tired but that most of the time my music choice has a bigger affect than either of those things.
In your journey to find your groove there may be hurdles to leap and brush to blaze through, which is all a part of the process. Without it your dancing would not have that beautiful, rare and complex depth. Dancing can be so reflective of life and what is going on inside of us and so I cannot tell you what your Boudoir Dance journey will hold for you , but I can share with you how it was for me. My dancing revealed some pretty personal things about me over the years and I hope it will do the same for you even though it is not always fun!
In my dancing I had the difficult recognition of my need to please others, to look good and to be in control at all times. Basically I have an ongoing struggle with vanity. Although being admired on center stage can have a certain satisfaction it is not the purest form of art and I have found it is a lesser satisfaction than what can be had!! What can be had is creative freedom and emancipation from that sneaky little fear block that all artists must endure and strive overcome at some point. Although music isn’t everything in the chemistry of a great dance I have learned that music can affect me in a way that triggers my ‘vanity’ response and certain types of music support my goal of honest expression and sublime surrender. It is up to each dancer to pay attention and learn how her heart and body respond to music.
It has been so difficult for me to let go of appearances and to be in the moment unfettered and free, gaining courage one dance at a time . But in this process I have found in myself a nurturer, a lover, a heroine and a wild women. What would I ever do without them? They bring me joy as they come out to play with reckless abandon, sometimes graceful, sometimes sloppy but always Divine.